...when we walk away and what remains is a question mark... I learned to breathe. I won't say I don't care, I won't lie. But with the time I learned to protect myself and my child from the pain. Not always possible, not entirely so, not as well as I'd wish to. Some days, like today, I'm facing the evening with fear. How will I explain to him, what will I say, how do I interpret the adults' selfishness to a two-year old... How do I translate the lack of love... Sometimes like today I feel I'm a bad mother for not providing my child with the best environment at any cost... Tomorrow will be a new day. Tomorrow I'll be challenged by little chores and everyday life... And again... To answer all those questions he will ask. Find the appropriate answers without knowing what "appropriate" means these days. But any time, any day, I'm staying here with him. And when I'm frightened or sad, I tell myself there is something big in the works for us. Because the Wheel keeps turning. Nothing is forever. Even the bad. This too shall pass. :)
Ah, and I started a new book... called "Winners". Because, you know, I must believe we are winners indeed. :)
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