Weddings, peonies, a bit of music...

I waited a while before writing about the past Depeche Mode concert because I really didn't want to sound insane. LOL What can I say? As always when a dream comes true, it was quite a bit surreal, like both believable and unbelievable, standing there, two days ahead, watching the stage building and trying to imagine how it will be, how it will look, feel, smell... Nothing I could imagine was even close to what happened in reality. I was once again reminded that my mind is so limited and this is so sad. The good thing is that apparently another mind somewhere out there has such imagination! I hadn't planned to work at this event, yet I had to, for a couple of days but it was a blessing in disguise for which I'm so grateful now. And it was cool to be serenaded at the sound check when the audience is missing, the stadium is empty, and only we, who were working there, were listening. I will remember this night. It would be impossible to forget. :)

Meanwhile, a friend of mine announced her upcoming wedding and, naturally, put me there, at the front, to organize it. LOL I'm not very much into weddings but... a friend is a friend. I wanted to avoid the usual white/pink (or peach)/red theme and chose creamy white and chocolate brown for her. Wishing them both a smooth and sweet journey together. :) And peonies. I love peonies. They are lush, seductive, aromatic, long-lasting, gentle, they are like a whisper on a hot summer night, like a soft touch of velvet, like a cake with rum or a Turkish coffee. Delicious and intense. :)

I'm still at the stage where I'm trying to picture it in my mind and browsing for palettes and ideas. It should be a bit old fashioned, yet elegant, may be bronze, or old silver...

I really like the process of creating the event in my mind, of walking around and taking photos of things and colors I'd use, of creating the pattern and then fitting the objects in it. It's my favorite part.

Creamy white peonies for the bride. :)

Speaking of peonies, on our way back from the Rila mountain yesterday, I found myself into Wonderland:

These are wild peonies in the forest. The whole place carried their aroma, it was magical. If you ever come to this part of the world, the trip to the Rila monastery and the lakes is worth it. :)

Nestinari (Fire Dancing)

Nestinari are people who dance bare feet in burning coal on the night of June 3rd. The custom was originally pagan but as so many other customs and dates, with the coming of Christianity, successfully combined pagan symbolism with Christian faith. Since then Nestinari dance with an icon of St. Konstantine and St. Helena in their hands. The dancers are generational, it is very rare for an outsider to become a Nestinar. Usually they come from Nestinari families.

Nestinari was added to the UNESCO list of non material tresures of the world.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZIAcYCAWIqo - a rare sighting of a lone Nestinar in a village where today the custom doesn't exist anymore.

The day in the Bulgari village, the only place remaining where the custom is preserved as it was, starts with a ritual procession of the Nestinari taking the icon of St. Konstantine and Helena to the sacred spring nearby, ritually washing themselves in the water, then taking the icon back to the chapel in the village where they stay inside for the rest of the day with no food or water. They listen only to the beat of the ritual drums for the whole day and pray, gradually reaching a trance.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f41lmvMKtE0

When the dusk comes, the fire is started at the village square and when the darkness falls, the Nestinari enter the coal, sometimes they yell but not of pain, they experience a culmination of their long held emotions, it's ecstatic. Gradually the dance becomes more rhythmic, following the drums as the Nestinari dance, first making a cross in the coal to honour the saints, then continuing in a circle. It's very common for the crowd to fall in trance too, so if you're an emotional creature, bring a friend to keep you away from the coal! :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8vPckBOGb0

Seriously, I've seen it once many years ago and it's a lifetime experience. The drums themselves are so powerful and the feeling is surreal! Nestinari is an act of sacrifice, cleaning and surrendering. It's a culmination of spirit ruling over the matter as Nestinari never get hurt or burned. It's faith against all else, mind against all we see and touch, it's about the most important being known with the heart not with the brain. :)

While there are Nestinari attractions for tourists along the seaside, the place to truly understand the symbolism and the meaning of the ritual remains only Bulgari in the Strandza mountain.

I've been reading - The Messenger

Klaus Joehle, "The Messenger":

“‘They’re not really stupid.  They just act like that because they’re scared.’”

“‘Scared of what?’”

“‘They’re scared of everything; scared of not being loved, scared of too much Love, scared of dying, of living, of not having enough food, scared that others will hurt them or take what they have.’  The words were just coming out of my mouth and I was listening to them the same way as he was.  ‘They’re even scared of what they don’t have, that others are better than them, of being alone, of being with people, of being made fun of, of not being liked or accepted, scared that something will go wrong, and sometimes they’re scared even when things go right.  They’re scared of those who are not so scared, and most of all, scared of each other.’”

“‘So?’ he asked with a puzzled look on his face.”

“‘Fear can drive you to do very unloving things.  It can even drive people crazy. It slowly drains all the Love out of life and leaves you with anger that can turn into hate.  It all comes down to a lack of Love.  Love is the food of the universe and everything in it.  Without Love there’s chaos, hate, anger, and fear.  Where there is Love there is peace, joy, fulfillment, trust, and abundance. That’s why things are the way they are, it’s just a matter of not being enough Love.’”

" Openly trusting

I’ve thought a lot about trust lately, partly because something has come up, that has touched that part of me that I keep so well hidden.

I wonder what it is that I’m afraid of?
 I wonder if I have really ever trusted, or if it was nothing more than a temporary illusion.
 I’ve thought about how many wonderful things I have destroyed because of my lack of trust.
There is nothing in life that I have ever come across that I couldn’t handle, yet the question remains: why am I scared?
No relationship works without trust regardless of whether it consists of friendship, Love, work or play.
It comes down to the same thing, trust.
Maybe it’s really myself that I don’t trust.
Do I trust myself, that I will pick the right whatever?
Possibly? Maybe? After all, who knows what’s right for me better than me.

I’ve heard it said that if you do what is right for you, that is selfish, but I know that if you don’t do what is right for you then that becomes destructive.  
So where is the balance?
And what will happen to me if I just say the hell with it and just trust?
Perhaps it’s whom I trust?
Well that didn’t work, did it? It appears I’m right back where I started.
Well, that leaves me with one choice, doesn’t it?
I hope that it’s not going to be as painful as my lack of trust has been.
On the other hand, Ladies First! "