Consider anything, only don't cry!

`Oh, don't go on like that!' cried the poor Queen, wringing her hands in
despair.  `Consider what a great girl you are.  Consider what a long way
you've come to-day.  Consider what o'clock it is. Consider anything, only
don't cry!' ("Alice in Wonderland - Through the Looking Glass")

Sometimes all I need is to just consider... who... how far... and just... only not cry.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVl4qvHuY8g

I've been reading - Kahlil Gibran

On Marriage
 
You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.


Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.


Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.

I've been reading - Esenin

Because it is summer... or because it is cold... Because it is time to hit the road again... or because the gypsies' carriages will soon travel the countryside... Because it is a bit scary... or because it feels like need of a story... Because of a little too much... or because of the lack of it... I am back to Esenin and one of his most beloved poems "Shagane, you, my Shagane":

Шаганэ ты моя, Шаганэ...

Шаганэ ты моя, Шаганэ!
Потому, что я с севера, что ли,
Я готов рассказать тебе поле,
Про волнистую рожь при луне.
Шаганэ ты моя, Шаганэ.

Потому, что я с севера, что ли,
Что луна там огромней в сто раз,
Как бы ни был красив Шираз,
Он не лучше рязанских раздолий.
Потому, что я с севера, что ли.

Я готов рассказать тебе поле,
Эти волосы взял я у ржи,
Если хочешь, на палец вяжи -
Я нисколько не чувствую боли.
Я готов рассказать тебе поле.

Про волнистую рожь при луне
По кудрям ты моим догадайся.
Дорогая, шути, улыбайся,
Не буди только память во мне
Про волнистую рожь при луне.

Шаганэ ты моя, Шаганэ!
Там, на севере, девушка тоже,
На тебя она страшно похожа,
Может, думает обо мне...
Шаганэ ты моя, Шаганэ.


I managed to find a relatively decent translation though not doing justice to the beauty of the original but still... it will give an idea.

Shaganet, o my love, Shaganet!
You will know because I am Nordic;
I can tell you a meadow, most scenic,
Moonlit rye waves one cannot forget.
Shaganet, o my love, Shaganet,

You will know because I am Nordic;
So bright shines the moon out there
That it may outglow any glare
Of Shiraz blazing forth from its tunic.
You will know because I am Nordic;

I can tell you a meadow, most scenic,
For my hair was gifted from rye,
Twixt your fingers you may intertwine -
I don’t feel any pain, any heartache.
I can tell you a meadow, most scenic.

Moonlit rye waves, one cannot forget,
Look so much like my curly hair, darling.
Oh, my love, please keep joking and smiling,
But don’t let me think of the silhouette
Of the rye waves, one cannot forget.

Shaganet, o my love, Shaganet!
There, up north, lives a maiden who also
Does resemble you terribly close,
May be now she’s thinking of me…
Shaganet, o my love, Shaganet.      
(http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/shaganet-o-my-love-shaganet/)

The poem is part of the Persian cycle. The rhythm of this poem is very specific and surely reminds of the Eastern, Arabic samples of poetry. It's a beautiful story about the touch which sometimes causes us pain but we still linger for it, and about love, present and absent. What I dislike in the translation is that namely the part about the pain is not conveyed well enough and is somehow lost among descriptions.

Weddings, peonies, a bit of music...

I waited a while before writing about the past Depeche Mode concert because I really didn't want to sound insane. LOL What can I say? As always when a dream comes true, it was quite a bit surreal, like both believable and unbelievable, standing there, two days ahead, watching the stage building and trying to imagine how it will be, how it will look, feel, smell... Nothing I could imagine was even close to what happened in reality. I was once again reminded that my mind is so limited and this is so sad. The good thing is that apparently another mind somewhere out there has such imagination! I hadn't planned to work at this event, yet I had to, for a couple of days but it was a blessing in disguise for which I'm so grateful now. And it was cool to be serenaded at the sound check when the audience is missing, the stadium is empty, and only we, who were working there, were listening. I will remember this night. It would be impossible to forget. :)

Meanwhile, a friend of mine announced her upcoming wedding and, naturally, put me there, at the front, to organize it. LOL I'm not very much into weddings but... a friend is a friend. I wanted to avoid the usual white/pink (or peach)/red theme and chose creamy white and chocolate brown for her. Wishing them both a smooth and sweet journey together. :) And peonies. I love peonies. They are lush, seductive, aromatic, long-lasting, gentle, they are like a whisper on a hot summer night, like a soft touch of velvet, like a cake with rum or a Turkish coffee. Delicious and intense. :)

I'm still at the stage where I'm trying to picture it in my mind and browsing for palettes and ideas. It should be a bit old fashioned, yet elegant, may be bronze, or old silver...

I really like the process of creating the event in my mind, of walking around and taking photos of things and colors I'd use, of creating the pattern and then fitting the objects in it. It's my favorite part.

Creamy white peonies for the bride. :)

Speaking of peonies, on our way back from the Rila mountain yesterday, I found myself into Wonderland:

These are wild peonies in the forest. The whole place carried their aroma, it was magical. If you ever come to this part of the world, the trip to the Rila monastery and the lakes is worth it. :)

Nestinari (Fire Dancing)

Nestinari are people who dance bare feet in burning coal on the night of June 3rd. The custom was originally pagan but as so many other customs and dates, with the coming of Christianity, successfully combined pagan symbolism with Christian faith. Since then Nestinari dance with an icon of St. Konstantine and St. Helena in their hands. The dancers are generational, it is very rare for an outsider to become a Nestinar. Usually they come from Nestinari families.

Nestinari was added to the UNESCO list of non material tresures of the world.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZIAcYCAWIqo - a rare sighting of a lone Nestinar in a village where today the custom doesn't exist anymore.

The day in the Bulgari village, the only place remaining where the custom is preserved as it was, starts with a ritual procession of the Nestinari taking the icon of St. Konstantine and Helena to the sacred spring nearby, ritually washing themselves in the water, then taking the icon back to the chapel in the village where they stay inside for the rest of the day with no food or water. They listen only to the beat of the ritual drums for the whole day and pray, gradually reaching a trance.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f41lmvMKtE0

When the dusk comes, the fire is started at the village square and when the darkness falls, the Nestinari enter the coal, sometimes they yell but not of pain, they experience a culmination of their long held emotions, it's ecstatic. Gradually the dance becomes more rhythmic, following the drums as the Nestinari dance, first making a cross in the coal to honour the saints, then continuing in a circle. It's very common for the crowd to fall in trance too, so if you're an emotional creature, bring a friend to keep you away from the coal! :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8vPckBOGb0

Seriously, I've seen it once many years ago and it's a lifetime experience. The drums themselves are so powerful and the feeling is surreal! Nestinari is an act of sacrifice, cleaning and surrendering. It's a culmination of spirit ruling over the matter as Nestinari never get hurt or burned. It's faith against all else, mind against all we see and touch, it's about the most important being known with the heart not with the brain. :)

While there are Nestinari attractions for tourists along the seaside, the place to truly understand the symbolism and the meaning of the ritual remains only Bulgari in the Strandza mountain.